Enjoy the April E-Newsletter, filled with photos, stories and highlights from our many events and programs!

 

Shelter Trustees Bette Aymar and Kirsten Ferrara were two of 10 women honored, April 1, 2015, at the Women of Initiative Awards at the Naples Beach Hotel and Golf Club. The event was presented by The Women’s Initiative Network and the Community Foundation of Collier County. The honorees were recognized for their community work and leadership.

View feature stories on these two ladies in eBella Magazine – Shelter Trustees are Women of Initiative

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This year’s keynote speaker for the Shelter from the Storm Luncheon was Susan Still, a survivor of domestic abuse whose husband was sentenced to 36 years in prison for verbally, emotionally, financially and physically abusing her. Her powerful story and a video that her husband directed their 13-year-old son to tape, where part of her presentation, March 26, 2015 at the Naples Beach Hotel. view video

Thank you to Naples Daily News for covering this event.

Violence victim shares story of horror — and hope

By Kristine Gill
Naples Daily News reporter

In the minutes before she was to speak to the dozens gathered at an event Thursday for the Shelter for Abused Women & Children, Susan Still prayed.

She prayed to calm her nerves and in the hope that her story of surviving domestic violence would come across.

“I pray and I become a vessel,” said Still, an advocate for victims whose story has been featured on 20/20 and the Oprah Winfrey Network.

It was prayer, too, that got Still through her last day in an abusive relationship more than 10 years ago. That day, her husband of 24 years had threatened one of her sons with violence after having spent the weekend sexually and physically abusing her.

“I knew I would die if I stayed any longer,” she said.

Still’s speech Thursday was part of the shelter’s annual fundraising event at the Naples Beach Hotel. The group hopes to raise $5.1 million for its operations this year. The shelter is one of only two in the state that does not receive funding at the county level.

Attendees gasped when real footage of Still’s abuse played over two screens at the front of the room. Many were moved to tears as she spoke of the relentless verbal abuse she suffered at the hands of her husband. The video showed Ulner Lee Still smacking his wife, threatening to knock her teeth out and calling her stupid no less than 23 times as he forced his 13-year-old son to record the exchange.

“How many times does someone have to call you something before you believe it?” Still said to the audience.

Still’s story made national headlines when in 2004, her former husband was sentenced to 36 years in prison, the longest sentence imposed in a New York domestic violence case in which the victim lived.

On the night she decided to leave, Still prayed her husband would leave her alone the next morning as she got ready for work. Most days, he criticized her makeup and clothing, looking for reasons to force her to call out sick. Still needed to get to work that day so she could later visit the police station and report the abuse. She prayed she could make it to her job one more time.

“For the first morning ever, he didn’t come anywhere near me,” she said.

Still told the men and women gathered to imagine having to leave their home, all of their belongings and their jobs with only the cash in their wallet.

“The pit in your stomach you’re feeling now is probably one thousandth of what I felt,” she said.

Still took her children to a shelter where they provided beds, food, toothbrushes and, most importantly, a safe place to catch her breath.

“It was there that I found time to figure out the next move,” she said.

Still urged attendees to donate to the Naples shelter because she said it offers victims with few resources and fewer options a haven and a gateway to a better future.

“Give generously today so you can change and elevate lives,” she said.

The Shelter for Abused Women & Children opened in 1989 with 20 beds and has since expanded to 60 and now includes a kennel for families’ pets.

“Every adult, child and pet has a right to lead a life free from violence and abuse,” Executive Director Linda Oberhaus said.

As of Thursday, the shelter was housing 27 adults, 13 children, three dogs and four birds.

• Brent Batten column: Human trafficking beyond immigrants
• Mending Broken Hearts Luncheon offers heartfelt help

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Human trafficking expands beyond immigrants, young people and sexual work

Brent Batten
Naples Daily News Columnist

Accounts earlier this month of a sex trafficking ring operating in Southwest Florida described a problem firmly rooted in the Hispanic community.

Victims brought into the U.S. illegally, held captive by Hispanic traffickers. Language barriers, a fear of deportation and a distrust of authorities all conspiring to keep the victims from accessing help.

But victim advocates say they have seen a shift in the nature of human trafficking in the region.

Operations such as the one uncovered through a two-year investigation in Collier, Lee, Hendry, Polk and Miami-Dade counties still exist, as evidenced by the arrests of 15 people and the rescues of six victims who were brought to the U.S. illegally. But no longer is the crime confined to the immigrant community, according to advocates who routinely work with sex trafficking victims.

Over the past several years, more and more victims are women who were born in the U.S., they say.

“When we first started in 2004-2005, we saw almost all the victims were foreign-born,” said Nola Theiss, executive director of the Human Trafficking Awareness Partnership in Fort Myers.

“Now a lot of the victims are our own children,” Theiss said. “Traffickers realize it’s cheaper to get someone who’s already here than paying to smuggle them into the country.”

Linda Oberhaus, executive director of the Shelter for Abused Women and Children in Collier County, has seen the same thing.

“People seem to think it’s international,” she said. “When I first saw the story, I thought, ‘That’s going to perpetuate the stereotype (that human trafficking is isolated to the immigrant community),’ ” Oberhaus said.

But at the shelter, which has served more than two dozen victims of sex trafficking in the past few years, the majority of victims are women from the United States.

About 17 percent of the cases originated in Collier County, 25 percent originated elsewhere in Florida, 50 percent elsewhere in the United States and only 7 percent were international cases, Oberhaus said.

“It hasn’t always been that way,” Oberhaus said.

She agrees with the assessment that traffickers find it’s cheaper to exploit victims already here. “Traffickers know what to look for. They’re not looking for bright, college-bound girls. They’re looking for girls with vulnerabilities,” she said.

Young women who have been abused, run away from home, have addictions or mental health issues are prime targets for traffickers.

“There are so many vulnerable people walking among us,” Oberhaus said.

“There are a lot of ways victims can be manipulated by the traffickers,” Theiss said.

Anna Rodriguez, founder of the Florida Coalition Against Human Trafficking, cautions that other stereotypes about human trafficking don’t always bear out in real life.

Victims aren’t always young.

“Everybody has concentrated so much on the minors,” Rodriguez said. “There’s very little services for the adult victims.”

And while sex trafficking grabs headlines and turns stomachs, most victims of human trafficking are forced into other types of labor, including in the hotel, restaurant and construction industries, Rodriguez said.

Theiss said traffickers share common traits.

“They’re evil people who are looking for victims because every victim brings them money. They don’t care about the wellbeing of the victims.”

The recent case in Southwest Florida, while not necessarily indicative of  the trends the advocates are seeing, can elevate awareness of the problem, Theiss said.

“This is a prime time to teach people about human trafficking. People need to know,” she said.

Connect with Brent Batten at bebatten@naplesnews.com, on Twitter@NDN_BrentBatten and atfacebook.com/ndnbrentbatten.

Mending Broken Hearts Luncheon

By Jean Amodea
Daily News correspondent

The Shelter for Abused Women & Children’s signature fundraiser, Mending Broken Hearts with Hope luncheon March 12 at the Ritz-Carlton Golf Resort raised $741,591 this year, drawing 720 benefactors at $350 per ticket.

“This is the event’s 15th year, and it has grown in scope and success. It is this sort of community support that has provided the wind beneath The Shelter’s wings for more than 25 years,” said Executive Director, Linda Oberhaus.

“We are humbled and inspired by the confidence the community has placed in us, and it is our resolve to continue to be faithful stewards of that trust.”

The proceeds will benefit The Shelter’s mission “to protect, prevent and prevail over domestic violence through advocacy, empowerment and social change.”

About 720 altruistic supporters, dressed in frocks and suits with complementing or matching handbags and shoes representing virtually every major designer, made an eye-appealing entry into the pre-event area.

While sipping iced tea and cocktails, some guests perused more than 100 silent auction items from local eateries, businesses and spas, while others shopped a Designer Boutique, also open the day before the event that featured local and national vendors.

Among the top items up for bid were six course dinner with wine pairings for 30 by executive chef John Welch at Avenue 5 ($7500 value); an 18-karat white gold and diamond butterfly necklace from Yamron Jewelers ($3000 value); and a luxury motor yacht Barton and Gray Mariners Club Cruise for up to three couples for two to three hours ($3500 value).

A special drawing of a 24-month lease for a 2015 Mercedes E350 Sport Sedan ($19,900 value) and a $1,000 Saks gift card added drama to the event.

Just after noon, resort staff chimed guests into the massive reception tent, replete with glistening chandeliers.

Tables dressed in ivory linens were dotted with a fluff of purple tissue from gift bags placed atop white garden chairs. Provided by Chico’s FAS Inc., which shared signature sponsorship with Arthrex Inc., each bag contained a necklace and a glittery heart pin.

In addition to table floral arrangements of colored hydrangeas and tulips, elevated wired, bird cage style centerpieces festooned with hanging ivy and feathered craft birds, created and underwritten by Shelter trustees Candace Raveis and Annette Pakula, were spectacular room focal points.

After opening remarks by NBC-2 News anchor Kellie Burns, special recognition was given to event chairwoman Gwyn Sanford, vice chairwomen Candace Raveis and Bev Haas and honorary chairwoman Dr. Mana P. Holtz.

Enjoyed by guests, a luncheon of white miso brushed salmon, sesame basmati rice cake, coconut broth, shiitake scallion and edamame was followed by a sweet finish — a milk chocolate tart with passion fruit and mango coulis.

Afterward, Oberhaus presented the Shelter address, followed by keynote speaker, Lynn Rosenthal, director of external affairs for the National Domestic Violence Hotline, Washington, D.C., office and former White House adviser.

For more information, call The Shelter for Abused Women & Children at 239-775-3862 or visit www.naplesshelter.org